Last week, during our recent Clutter-Free Academy Group Q&A Call (www.ClutterFreeAcademy.org) we had a lengthy discussion about perfection, and I want to share some insights with our MoJo Community today.
To start off, I have a confession…when I was in my teens up to young adulthood, my family called me “Polly Perfect.” I was obsessed with getting the perfect grades, wearing the perfect clothes, getting the perfect job, and ultimately marrying the perfect husband.
Now that I’ve mastered human behavior and dynamics, I know that my quest for perfection all stemmed from the fear of not being “good enough” and if I’m not good enough, I won’t be loved…!” OMG the pain I was in…!!!!
Does this resonate with you and sound familiar? Well, you’re not alone!
Today, I’m writing this message to you as a “Recovered Perfectionist” and I’ve led thousands of ladies and gentlemen out of this paralyzing “Perfectionist” state of mind and state of being!
You see, many people spend their lives striving for perfection, only to find there is no such thing!!! [Hint: that’s an AH-HA moment for you!]
The Good News is: each of us is PERFECT, WHOLE & COMPLETE JUST THE WAY WE ARE. So I invite you to LOVE YOURSELF FOR ALL THAT YOU ARE…AND ALL THAT YOU ARE NOT!!!!
The not-so-good news is that most of us have forgotten this and, as a result, we spend our whole lives in the exhausting pursuit of perfection, often creating unnecessary suffering for ourselves and those around us!
So, you have two choices in your search for perfection: you can continue to try to fix the imperfect, or you can let go and be free of the impossible pursuit.
The next time you find yourself worrying about how to be perfect, consider these helpful reminders to let go that I learned from Deepak Chopra:
The Moment Is Always Perfect
This statement can be very confusing for many people. How can a moment be perfect when you’ve just lost your job, a relationship has ended, or you’ve been diagnosed with a serious illness? It’s important to know that perfection isn’t always what we expect or what we interpret as happiness. Perfection just means it’s absolutely correct.
Acceptance
Acceptance is an integral part of the perfection prescription. The whole universe has conspired since the beginning of time to create this present, perfect moment. We must learn to live in the moment, to accept everyone we meet, and to see every situation we find ourselves in as perfect in that moment.
When you stop struggling against what is, you’ll discover the wonderful opportunity that’s waiting for you. By welcoming everything, you’ll be able to create a future beyond your wildest dreams.
Meditation Is a Tool
Meditation is the most powerful tool to reconnect with your perfection. Meditation takes your awareness from activity into silence, from the imperfect external to the perfect internal. Every time you make this inward journey, you bring a little more perfection back into your life.
Perfection Isn’t in Things
Perfection is in the silent spaces between things—the spaces between our thoughts, our breaths, or the stillness of a yoga pose. When you begin to recognize the spaces, you’ll recognize the perfection. Make space and time in your life for the perfection to shine through. Pause every once in a while, look at your life, and begin to recognize the perfection that’s already there.
Our Self, our essence, is already perfect, so when we begin to live from that level of Being, the world we are projecting also becomes a reflection of our perfection. If you want to create perfection in your life, you must first find the perfection within yourself.
The Vedantic text, the Bhagavad Gita says, “When you can see the Divine within yourself, you will know perfection in everything.” Early in the text, it says when we are grounded in our own inner essence, we begin to live our lives from the field of silence and infinite possibilities, and only then will our actions be perfectly correct in any situation. Now let’s dive deeper into these Vedantic teachings to learn how to let go of the pursuit of perfection …
Fearlessness—fear contracts and limits our freedom, perfection is unbounded. Remember it’s your universe; transmute fear into faith and love.
Truthfulness—perfection demands openness, honesty and integrity. Be true to yourself. Know when to speak and when to say nothing.
Generosity—perfection is to give fully from the abundance of life and be grateful for all that life offers in return. Perfection is to say “thank you” for everything.
Forgiveness—we can always forgive the person, whose essence is perfect, even if we can’t forgive the imperfect act. If we can’t forgive, we are the ones who suffer.
Non-attachment—be bold with your desires, but remain detached from the outcome of your desire. Non-attachment is saying, “This is what I think I want but, if there’s something better, it’s OK to send that instead.” Allow the wisdom of uncertainty to shower you with its perfect blessings.
Patience—perfection is eternal; find it in stillness of meditation. Water it daily with your presence, watch it grow, and enjoy its fruits.
Compassion—look for the perfection in everyone and everything. It’s sometimes well hidden, so look carefully. Keep in mind that God knows how much we love Him by how we treat other people.
Peacefulness—violence to any living creature or to the planet always comes from ignorance. When you see God in everyone, you will never do harm.
Joy—if there isn’t joy in your spiritual practice, do something to change it.
Surrender—when we give everything to the Divine, we have nothing to worry about.
Nothing in the external world can give you perfection and no one can make you perfect. Stop waiting for someone or something to change. Instead, shift your attention and your attitude. Perfection is your essence; you were born with it. Now enjoy it.
Let’s keep this discussion going…let me know what are of your life you struggle with perfection and how you can resolve it using the tips above. Share your comments below!
In the meantime, we’re sending you MoJo’licious Love,
